He
tangoed in Paris
Bribed his way into Mexico
Yodeled in the Venezuelan Andes
Soloed in Carnegie
Hall
Swam with deadly
sea turtles in
Costa Rica
Partied with a Colombian
transsexual gogo dancer and an Italian lingerie salesman in a train on his
way to Wein
Got rubbed-down by an 80 year
old hashish junkie wearing only a beanie
and speedo in a 900
year old Moroccan bathhouse
Did a tour of duty in 'Nam
Explored Vulcan (Canada, that
is)
Shopped duty free in Colombia
Ate the best gnocchis of his life
in Buenos Aires
Skinny-dipped with fashion models
in Taiwan
Hustled pool in Zurich
Discovered undersea
treasure in
the Philippines
Witnessed bizarre
sex acts in
Bangkok
Bought a BENZ in Germany and drove
it on the Autobahn
Had his body greased-down
with chicken innards during a Cuban Santeria ritual to dispel the
death curse of an old girlfriend
And most recently -- crashed
the Communist Party's party in Beijing!
***
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