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https://ducts.sundresspublications.com/content/essays/treating-motherhood-as-a-job-like-any-other/ The Webzine of Personal Stories Thu, 24 Mar 2011 14:47:15 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.7.5 https://ducts.sundresspublications.com/content/essays/treating-motherhood-as-a-job-like-any-other/comment-page-1/#comment-1295 Thu, 24 Mar 2011 14:47:15 +0000 http://s27317.gridserver.com/content/treating-motherhood-as-a-job-like-any-other/#comment-1295 I can’t relate to your seemingly futile, soul-seeking quest for likeminded mommy friends nor to your view that you were relegated to boring dinner parties, where inane “PC” chatter was de rigeour, just because you happen to now have children. (What happened to your friends who were running naked with you in the snow? Why aren’t you having dinner parties with them?) Your article may resonate with mothers who have very young children or babies. It is a very time-intensive, sleep-deprived and often isolating, yet brief, period of mothering. I have three children (all in their teens) so I have a different perspective. Yes, I went through my share of vapid “mommy-and-me” classes, but I never expected to make any deep connections with other mothers in attendance. I had my girlfriends. If I happened to connect with another mother, it was a bonus. But I never expected finding a soulmate, at least not in a Music Together class! Your children are still very young, so your feelings if isolation are understandable. When your children get older and attend school, you will have the pleasure of meeting many stay-at-home mothers who are witty, charming, well-read and
intelligent. You will also meet many who are dull, provincial, seemingly illiterate and shalow–just like people you probably encountered in the workforce! Lucky you if all your colleagues were scintillating conversationalists and you forged
lifelong friendships. Life is full of acquaintances, good and bad. It’s great (and an important part if your “job”) to get good mothering tips and, yes, you wil have to turn to mothers for that. Chances are you won’t find your soulmate on the playground. But sometimes you will find mothers who become your lifeline. To relegate this period of your life as a time where you will attend boring dinner parties and playgroups to be accepted by the “right parents” and to have “safe conversations” is up to you. Perhaps I chose the road less travelled. I refused to sublimate who I am as a woman, a
thinking, creative person, just because I happen to be a stay-
at-home mom. Yeah, it’s a job. But so what? So go ahead and run naked…

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