Hello again! Dale Seever here (Class of I’d Rather Not Say!) wanting to let you know about some updates to my life. Long story short: I’m no longer with my wife, Ginny. We “gave it a good go,” as she liked to say. She always had such fun phrases. “Nippy Skippy” was another one. “Let’s try couples therapy.”
Anyway–please update your mailing list, as I’m no longer at the Hayward address, and instead will be accepting mail from a P.O. Box outside of the city of dreams—Los An-ga-lees! I know, I know. I can hear Professor Reed now, “Fruits and Nuts,” indeed!
As to my profession, please list that I am continuing to pursue my dream as an entertainer and that anyone from the school who’s settled in the greater LA area should please contact me through the alumni web page.
Greetings fellow “Fightin’ Methodists”! Dale Seever here (Class of Who Can Remember it Seems so Long Ago!). Just checking in. Not sure if you received my last update. The mail has been tricky and my use of the library PC terminal is somewhat limited.
As fate would have it, I was at Fred Crayton’s (class of ‘77) home in Escondido this past weekend for a lovely cubed cheese affair for regional alums. I hadn’t received an email alert about the event, but luckily was scheduled for the evening by Silver Tray Staffing and once Freddy and I figured out we both attended the same prestigious university, well…what a time we had! It’s always great to see old friends and sample some fine squares of domestic cheeses. I might as well update you on Fred’s latest – his son is no longer headed to Brown. Looks like he’s decided to stay close to home here and soak up some time in God’s College.
I was in Fred’s can and found the latest copy of The Knuckler under a stack of Escondido Living and a dog-eared Land’s End catalog. Noticed that you hadn’t had a chance to run the new info I sent along last time. I imagine the annual Coal & Cabbage Fest has been keeping you pretty busy, so to reiterate the latest: I’m still separated from my wife of twelve wonderful years and am now living the life of a Hollywood entertainer! You can just say I’m “in the industry,” unless you think that’s confusing for the folks near the steel mill.
I’d be very interested in hearing from any alumni in the area, especially if they need someone for a wedding, funeral, bat mitzvah – I’d do anything at this point. Really anything.
Hello there, friends! Dale Seever (Class of Methinks Maybe Your Spam Filter is a Bit Too Strong!). Your quarterly publication schedule really makes waiting for these updates a killer. Another couple of months and, wow, a lot has happened! Please consider this an update to my update that was sent to you in March.
First of all, I’m accelerating through my improv classes at the CSP (Club of Standing People) and after just three more levels, I could be picked to take tickets at the afternoon shows! We’re all excited about that, ‘cause it’s just one more way to get seen by LA’s movers and shakers! A few of my comedy mates and I are talking about getting together our own long-form improv group, called Who Let the Old Guy In! JK, we’ll probably end up as the Steaming Pickles.
Jory, a good looking kid in the group who has a lot of funny impressions of reality television stars I never heard of, is the de facto leader, so I leave it up to him. He’s been here for three months and already landed a gig putting masking tape on laptops whenever they use them on “The New Adventures of Old Christine.” This really is a town that rewards youth!
It just occurred to me: if any alumni are interested in having the Pickles come back and run a workshop sometime, or just do a three-hour long-form improv performance, please contact me! We use the Harold technique and man, are there a lot of rules. But the funniest one is “never say no,” which is exactly what a couples therapist once told me. Turns out advice for a successful relationship is the same as the training for improv. Thanks, Del Close!
Sidenote: I wanted to correct an error in your May issue: That’s not me next to Saito Higgenbotham. It’s Carl Dypson. He’s much taller than me and walks with some difficulty due to a bad case of gout. You can see his crutches leaning up against the buffet table behind him, next to the creamed spinach carafe. (We’re easily confused–just ask Julie Kellerman! *Wink*)
Okey doke. Dale Seever (Class of Is This Thing On?) writing with some urgency here. I’ve still not been contacted by anyone from the College. Is it still there? I’m wondering if the financial downturn has affected the publication budget. I sure hope not! I always look forward to reading the Dead & Gone section to see who I’ve outlived.
By the way, does Mariah Carey make you sad? She sure as heck makes me feel blue. Not her music. That’s pure joy. But the woman herself. Especially during the fallow, in-between album times. She went a little crazy there for a bit, didn’t she? I mean, she’s always been the kind of gal who I would suspect would be really into butterflies and glitter, but inventing an entire alter ego based on those two things is a little out there, even for me! Whenever I see her on a magazine cover, I just want to give her a hug. I bet she’d give a good hug in return.
I like long hugs myself. My ex-wife never cared for that. She was a like a hummingbird with the hugs. Dart in and dart out. Barely any contact and no time for an exchange of warming feelings. But we’re officially divorced, so no need to tread in that dirty under-bridge water!
So, I am single. And looking to make a change. Hoping you can help. My comedy group has decided to go in a more “youthful” direction. They just didn’t seem to know what to do with my Pat Paulson references and my daring, if subtle, work setting up Mary Tyler Moore parodies.
Please let the alumni network know that I’m out here and doing fine, but could use a hug. Or a paying job. Thinking about getting a tropical fish.
Trying to stay positive! This is Dale Seever (Class of I Sent an Email to Myself Just to Check That It Works. It Does). Felt a little bad about the needy tone in my last update. If you have not already run with that copy, please swap it out with what I provide you herein: Dale’s met a nice woman from Lancaster, California. She rescues animals, many of whom are missing something. A tail. A leg. A nose. I kid her that all I’m missing is my heart, and that’s why she let me in!
I’m thinking of getting a tattoo, she’s got a lot of ink – and it’s very “in” here in LA. But I’m worried about what would happen if I was ever cast as Stanley Kowalski in Streetcar. That’s my dream role. How would I hide a barbed wire bicep ring in a tank top?
I’ve moved into a loft in downtown LA. It’s a block from Skid Row, but I feel being close to that kind of poverty helps me keep an edge to my performances. It also keeps an edge to my walk home from Ralph’s! (Ralph’s is the local supermarket chain here. A lot like Path-Mart, but with better lighting and less cat piss smell.)
So, I’m happily in love, and developing some new projects in LA, but eager to connect with alums around the country. Looking forward to vest weather! That should sum it up. I’d appreciate a reply just to confirm you’re going to go with this new copy.
Some Things I’ve Pleasured Myself To But Wish I Hadn’t
Home Front (Short-lived ABC Drama about life during WWII)
Batman, the animated series
Shape magazine
James Clavell’s Shogun
West Elm catalog
Robert A. Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land
Amethyst, Princess of Gemworld, Comic
Time Out
How to Use Illustrator 5.0
“This Time Together,” Carol Burnett audiobook
ABC This Week with David Brinkley
eBay
Ella Fitzgerald’s “A Tisket A Tasket”
YouTube video of Leonard Nimoy singing the Hobbit song
The Hollywood sign
Garfield’s friend, Nermal
Picture galleries from Comic Con
Woodstock documentaries
Titanic
The CW
New emails
Divine Design with Candice Olson
1970s sweater pattern books
Roasting root vegetables
Vermont
Whoa! Not sure if you got that one from me, Dale (Class of Now Wishing Email Wasn’t So Darn Easy!) but (red faced emoticon!) it was not intended for you. I tried to hit the undo message button, but that seemed to send it again…and to my niece. Oh boy, if we ever meet, we can have a good laugh over that, eh? Please confirm that you’ll not print that in The Knuckler! Or you’ll have to rename it The Chuckler! Ha. Ha?
Glad to know that you got my email! Dale (Class of You Sure Know How to Get to a Person) here. Not thrilled with what you chose to run with after all this. But I guess that’s just life in the modern age. Please send future correspondence to my address in New York. I’m going to give the Big City a whirl.
Who knows? Maybe I can land a gig writing a piece for an online webzine of fiction, humor, and personal narrative. As long as I’m not handing out flyers for stand up nights and musicals in Times Square.