Shootout at Depression Gulch

The clock hesitates. The black blind draws down.
If you feel like you’re sinking, you are sinking.

When the furnace clicked on, I ran
to the vent like a mouse to the trap.

The gray sky so thick, so thick, so….
Remember when they used to care what you thought?

Snow in them thar clouds, Buckaroo! Best be
rounding up the varmints for the ice ball competition!

You can survive at 55. Degrees, years, but not test scores.
Droopy with a chance of more droops.

Hot breath. Oh, on your cheek, whispering your name.
The parts to a furnace are petulant in their numerousness.

Which reminds me of a tumor I once knew. A car starts—
or does it?—on the street outside. A grimace is as good

as a smile to a blind midget. I am a mental midget
for the love of Pete, Riley, and all the others, God included.

God, the big furnace in the sky, clicked off long ago,
yet we are bent at the vents. Call it prayer or faith.

I keep saying half-life
when I mean half-light.

* * *

Last Meals

My mother’s down to three meals
she can cook. Blind, she measures
with her fingers. Spills wash over
the counter, leavings of a bitter tide.

My father, allowed nothing green, must
have meat. Their dueling pills rattle off
sticky tile. Chicken tonight, dry breasts over rice.
Milk for their bones, dropped morsels for mice.

Home to visit, what can I do against the wiry
will to carry on? I recite with them remembered
grace. I clear the dishes, that’s allowed.
TV and audio books muffle them into sleep—

on his couch, in her chair—and I am talking
to nothing but air. I eat the salt meant to be sugar.

* * *

Hitchhiker’s Guide to Hitchhiking

Stones are like snowflakes
God forgot to melt
and therefore became chips
off the old block.

Even God’s driveway
is cracked and weedy.
Sarcasm is not the currency
of need.

Sometimes wishful thinking
is just fishful winking.
The thumb is not an effective
weapon of choice

except in eyeball instances.
Improvisation and candy
are both underrated as tools
for opening jammed intentions.

A hammer is as good as a fishhook
to a blind prophet. A bird in the hand
is a useful snack opportunity. Dogs
only go so far, then they stop

to sniff the hands of time. Time does not
stand still, though it does imitate
slow-moving mammals and mimes.
When the wind blows you backward

it is really blowing you forward.
Tell everyone you can play the guitar—
be daring like that. Pretend your name
is Sage. Travel light, but don’t forget

your nail clippers and underwear
portfolio. Don’t leave the elephant
in the room. Memorize facts about
the moon and six permanent addresses.

Put a penny in your shoes and a quarter
up your ass. Keep the penny for your thoughts
but lose the quarter. Keep your nose clean
and ants in your pants.

Always put your best foot in your mouth.
Invent hobo songs and sing them loudly
when you must sing. Sing when you
want to cry. Wear your vice versa vest.

Always say Thanks for the ride
and tip your hat. Always wear a hat.